A matter of running

Bismillah

Can you tell me what running is about?
Because I am very much confused. Very much unsure and undecided. Whether to run or not to run. And more importantly, the reason for me to run in the first place.

Most of the time I contemplated. Running seems to be fun, but it takes a lot more than your usual walk as well.

And if I were to talk about running in the sense of my pace, in living my job and life. I would say now I am actually crawling, with all my might and will. Trying to get up, just to walk first. Not even running yet.

And the very reason I am writing this is because I think that running, in my current condition, is actually running away. And that worries me. If I were to decide to leave, I want it to be because I wanted to do whatever it is on the other side, not because I want to run away from my current situation. And this situation is actually a result of the decision I confidently and adamantly made few months back, which also makes me wonder, why the hesitations I am having now?

Still unsure and undecided. I shall see would I run as if I am in a race or would I actually run away?

O Allah, do grant me Your Guidance and Assistance in this matter so that it becomes a means for me to get closer to You and Your blessings.

#lost
#donotleavemeastray

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