Sunday, April 24, 2022

Thoughts in boxes

Have you ever see your mind as a library or store room of many (endless) stuff? Because I do. There are compartments for knowledge, memories, people, favourites, dislikes, etc. And of course, there are overlaps between each other (I mean, that's just how messy I am). And there are some thoughts that have been shut nicely in their own box, kept away, undisturbed. But there are some that are being reopened so many times that I lost count (yes, I am an overthinker - in case you are wondering). And mind you, these are the kind of thoughts that best kept shut - because they hurt. 


And I thought I had long forgiven myself (read: self-healing) and moved on. But I proved myself wrong. Every time I am facing a difficulty, these thoughts resurfaced and nudged my sanity over and over again. So I wondered, have I ever healed to begin with? 

Why is there so much of resentment and guilt around all these? 

What's the line between perseverance and self-love? 

How do I keep my sanity and keep on pushing through with a smile on my face? 

How do I keep being kind when all I want to do is break down and just cry? 

How do I continue giving when I am just filled with void? 

Can someone help me? 

24042022
0824H

2 comment(s):

Atim, hope everything is better and different now. Enjoy reading your blog and hope you will write more.

All the best on your study and life.

Tqvm for your kind words 🥰

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